October 24, 2008

22 months: Teaching the Pig to Potty, Helping Mama Around the House, and Proactively Taking our Hand



You are 22 months old today. I cannot believe that you are two months away from your second birthday! This time of year is so much fun, but it also flies by very quickly. Things start to speed up around Halloween, then Thanksgiving rushes past and before we know it, Christmas (and your birthday) is here. I had better start planning your birthday party now, if there is to be one! We'll have to see how busy everyone is in early or mid-December.

It is so much fun these days to watch you play. Yesterday I observed you singing to yourself as you played with your tractor, pulling it along and stopping every so often to “feed” its passengers (the pig, the cow, the horse, the lamb, and the farmer) with your slice of cheese. I think you favor the horse, because you perpetually choose the horse as the driver of the tractor, relegating the farmer to one of the back seats.



Later, when you sat down on the potty (where the tractor and its passengers are required company), you let the pig see the “kaka” in the potty by lifting him up and tilting his head as to show him the contents. (I’m sure the pig will appreciate this lesson.) When I came back a couple of minutes later to check on you, the tractor was empty of all its passengers and the pig, cow, horse, lamb, and farmer had all joined you on the potty, where they were sitting lined up between your legs, apparently taking a private lesson. Now that you have mastered the potty experience, you are very correct in assuming that you need to start practicing teaching this skill to others. The pig, cow, horse, lamb, and farmer are as good pupils as any. It is very smart of you to sharpen your teaching skills now, for in the future, you are fully expected to pass on everything that I have taught you to any prospective younger siblings.



You love it when I can join you in your play, and in the past couple of weeks, you’ve begun to extend the invitation to play by taking my finger, and daddy’s too, and gently pulling us into the living room. And this coming on the heels of my comments last month about how you absolutely refused to hold anyone’s hand! You might have a sixth sense, or something, to know that I charged you in front of the whole world for not holding my hand during a few isolated incidents, when you didn’t feel like being constrained. And you may have thought that this was incredibly unfair. You may have resolved: “I’ll show her! I can hold a hand! In fact, I can initiate holding a hand!” Yes, yes - you can. This new finger-grabbing habit of yours is very effective, as it really tugs at our hearts.


You make the best faces. You are a total ham, an excellent little clown, and I hope that I had something to do with that by demonstrating to you for the past 22 months what a ham/clown looks like. (Though, I must give your father some credit too; he is also pretty good at being a ham and a clown.) Your clown faces range from the exaggerated surprised face, to the oooooh funny face, which entertained all of your Hungarian relatives a few weeks ago, to a large variety of exaggerated happy faces. Whether you are making a goofy face to make everyone laugh or truly reacting to something, your face mirroring your emotions, you are sure fun to watch.



This month, you have begun to take your clothes off. This is a great first step to being able to go potty on your own. I have happy imaginings of this. You are not yet fast enough, but we’re working on it. The problem is, you can take your pants OFF, but you don’t yet know how to put them back ON. Also, you like to take them off randomly, even when you don’t have to go potty. And once you’ve managed to wiggle out of them, you really just like to run around naked. This might be fine if we lived in the jungles of Africa, where both the weather and cultural norms would allow children this type of behavior. But this is not Africa and the October weather here is not conducive to your parading around in your birthday suit. I’m sorry to disappoint, but we’re going to have to put those pants back on.

One thing about this, though: I know that it could be so much worse than just your taking off clean pants/underwear and running around, free like a gazelle. Children about your age everywhere love to be free of their clothing, and those who are still in diapers want nothing more than to be free of those. I have heard of children your age taking off their soiled diapers and going to town with the contents. (Heard? Ha! I must painfully remind myself that not only have I heard of this, I actually LIVED THIS EXPERIENCE with 18-month-old twin boys, whom I used to baby-sit as a teen. Let me tell you, finding Mikey and Frankie in their cribs after their nap with their diapers off and the contents smeared everywhere wasn’t a pretty sight.) Am I glad that – thanks to early potty training – you will NEVER surprise me this way! Your free gazelle-like tendencies don’t sound so bad now, do they, when put in that context.





You continue to love everything on wheels. Cars, trucks, tractors, trolleys, wagons – these are your toys and the subject of your conversations these days.

You have also been especially fascinated with bicycles this month. You go wild every time you see one. You had the chance to try a tricycle at the store (your feet almost reach) and you also tried to push along your friend’s bicycle on the trail one day. You’ll be glad to know that your father and I have discussed your need for some wheels and you should be getting a tricycle or maybe even two in the near future.




You are Mama’s little helper. Whether you’re helping to bring the groceries into the house, carrying your own plastic bag, or helping me with dinner, dropping each baby potato into the pot of cold water, or throwing away some garbage (or perceived garbage), you love to help. You’ve even begun to take over some of the bug-catching activity in the house. When you see what looks like a bug to you, you don’t wait for me anymore. You take action, running to get a piece of toilet paper, then running back to the scene with a long trail of toilet paper behind you, and when you’ve gathered up your “bug,” you hurry back to the bathroom to throw it away. You haven’t yet caught any actual bugs, but I don’t want to discourage this helpfulness, so I pretend and applaud your efforts. When you are done, you make sure that the long string of toilet paper also gets tossed into the toilet, struggling with it until every bit of it is in there.

I have designated one of the lower kitchen cabinets with pots and pans that you are allowed to play with. You love going into that cabinet, arranging and rearranging its contents until they fit perfectly. If the cabinet door doesn’t close right, you work at it some more until you get it right. You also play with the squash and the potatoes, which you like to move from one pot to another. This generally occupies you while I cook and also keeps you within view. Again, at the end of this activity, you voluntarily put away everything in its place. I don’t need to say a thing.



Regret, it seems, is a mother’s portion. No matter how much she might do right through the course of the day, in the still of the night, she will inevitably remember those things that she didn’t do so well.

It was one of those days today. Clients pulling at me from every which way, responses needed NOW, and on top of all that, a million things to do for our upcoming trip tomorrow. You wanted my attention at times today when I just couldn’t give it. Tonight, as you snuggled close to me and contentedly drifted off to sleep, my heart ached that I wasn’t more attentive, more patient with you today. It didn’t help that there had been great moments, as in the above and below photos, taken this afternoon, when we finally played in the fallen leaves, chasing each other and enjoying our time together. It didn’t erase those other moments when I know I could have done better.

Caleb, I can’t promise to always do things perfectly. I am not perfect. But I resolve to learn from days like today and do better the next day, and the next day, and the next...
Tomorrow will be a great day.

Love,
Mama

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